The Sacred Art of Eating

Part one, of a recipe from the Quick, Quick, Slow chapter.

• Irish Cream Tiramisu

We started the preparation of this Baileys Tiramisu last night, to serve to friends this evening. Now we’re not sure entirely what went wrong, but our proportions and the proportions given in Nigella Express simply did not match up. On the one hand, this means we have over a packet of Savoiardi biscuits in the cupboard now. On the otherhand, it meant we were left with a large volume of espresso-Baileys mixture last night…which this morning with the addition of some ice cubes and a couple of croissants on the side, was absolutely gorgeous. That kind of mistake we can cope with!

A miserable Monday night, and a desire for something better than takeaway.

• Naan Pizza

I’d been skeptical about this recipe, I will admit. Whilst Nigella claims they are okay (or at least superior to shop-bought pizza bases,) I am not a huge fan of shop-bought naan bread. Equally, the foodie in me is ashamed to admit to finding the texture of bottled or tinned mushrooms (something of a staple in mountainous Italy) to be a bit weird…I have been known to be fazed by them. On the other hand, I do really like fontina cheese…mmmm, trainers!

Despite my misgivings, I have to say this was a resounding sucess. To do these again I’d need to choose a different tomato base, as the bruschetta mix I chose from Waitrose had an over-abundance of olive slices for Dougal’s liking (spot on for me!) but otherwise I’d repeat them in a flash. Very, very Express (at most, seven mins easy prep followed by five mins in the oven) and yummy to boot.

I was going to argue that it wasn’t a cheap meal- you’d probably need to buy all the ingredients (naans, tomato topping, mushroom antipasti, fontina cheese)- but per portion it probably still came in at less than extortionate, utterly not worth it Dominos/Pizza Hut/name-a-chain pizza. And it looked cool too.

Creating an unusual breakfast treat for your still-slumbering house-guest before dashing off to work? It must be Nigella Express!

• Pear and Ginger Muffins

Our house guest was due to take a train back to Nottingham on Monday morning; we both had to be at work as usual that day. I didn’t think I could abandon him in the house with nothing to eat and this recipe spoke promisingly of being largely preparable the night before- wet ingredients jug in the fridge, dry ingredients on the side.

For the most part this was true, and you basically did just have to add pear, mix the whole lot together and spoon the contents into muffin cases. (Note to self: buy proper muffin cases to go with the nice big muffin tin re-acquired from home!) However you’d probably be surprised to find how time consuming peeling a couple of pears and filling paper cases actually is. I was consequently a little late for work.

Lateness aside, this were a simply divine breakfast treat; light and moist and warmly but not dominantly spicy. They were so good, in fact, that I made them again three days later for a colleague’s bring-a-dish leaving lunch at work.

With RandomAndy staying, it seemed an ideal opportunity to work through a good number of recipes and have a proper big dinner.

• Anglo-Asian Lamb Salad
• Brandied-Bacony Chicken
• Potato and Mushroom Gratin
• Instant Chocolate Mousse
• Chocolate Mint Cookies

There was quite a lot of food in this meal, so I shall try not to waffle and to cover only the salient points!

The Anglo-Asian Lamb Salad was just smashing. It was sweet (redcurrant jelly) and acid (rice vinegar, soy sauce) and hot (chilli and spring onion) and moist (the lamb got to sit in a little bag of foil after being fried) and crisp (salad leaves a-plenty). This added definite posh factor to the meal and, what with it being really easy to make (you assemble the dressing whilst the meat is frying, and then basically mix it all together) will definitely be going on our ‘to be cooked again’ list.

The roast chicken and accompanying gratin were a bit of a let down, mostly because they gave away the fact that I apparently cannot carve a chicken. At all. Part of this is a dire need for a decent sharp knife (to be bought with the house move next month!) but a lack of basic skills and wisdoms didn’t help either. Instead of bringing a marvellous roast chicken to the table or presenting everyone with their cuts of choice, we ended up with a rather sad little plate with one or two slices of meat and then some shreds. As for the gratin, I found it a bit wet. However Dougal had let the milk that the potatoes were cooked in catch and as such a lot of it got left in the pan; we added a bit more to compensate but perhaps over did it. I like the concept though, of a mushroomy potato bake, so I may try this again.

The instant chocolate mousses, shelved the previous week on account of containing non-vegetarian marshmallows, were pretty good despite possibly being subject to abuse at the construction stage. You melt the marshmallows and chocolate and butter together and then fold this mixture into vanilla’d whipped cream. I suspect I ought to have let the chocolate mix cool more so that it was a similar consistency to the cream. As it was I was attempting to fold hot and runny into stiff and cooler, with predictably poor results.

Nevertheless, the dark little pots ended up quite foamy in content and looked pretty smart in our wee white ramekins. (Not smart enough for Dougal who felt the need to adorn his with Barbie Sprinkles.) We had quite a bit left over; over and above the six ramekins called for we had a further two whole and two half portions left over.

The chocolate mint cookies served as a high cal, high chocolate chip after dinner mint. I’d kept the pudding deliberately small to give me the opportunity to cook these cookies which have been on my ‘excited about’ list for some time. Mint chocolate is one of my all-time greatest weaknesses. These are in fact simple double chocolate chip cookies which are then glazed with a highly minty chocolatey glaze. They were pretty potent and, on account of being deliberately small (ish-I’d make them smaller next time) very easy to put several away of!

However, most curiously, by the following day, all the mint flavour had gone. GONE, I tell thee! Eaten up by the angels, it’s the only likely explanation. Most upsetting and more than a little perturbing.

We all went to bed heaving and stuffed. All, that is, except me. I had to make a start on preparing breakfast…

Another big post coming soon, with details of the four course meal we cooked on Sunday night and how that brings us back up to speed with the challenge.

Right now, however, there are plenty of relatively new posts for you to be commenting on, and I need to get to bed! Patience, my pretties!

We received an impromptu invite for dinner on Saturday, the one night our weekend house guest wasn’t with us. Seemed only reasonable we took a little something and continued our journey through the book.

• Eton Mess

This recipe doesn’t deviate a great deal from the traditional Eton Mess make-up, although it is Nigella, so naturally there are pomegranates involved. In this case the (dull, early April) strawberries are steeped in pomegranate juice whilst you whip the cream -by hand, because we still haven’t bought an electric whisk- which really helps bring the flavours out.

Perhaps we could’ve whipped the cream a little more; perhaps it was in fact perfect. In the event this wasn’t the most beautiful of dishes, but then perhaps this is rather the point. Whatever the case, is tasted pretty damn fine!

We have an old uni friend staying this weekend, so you may notice we’ll be cooking quite a lot. Starting with our fabulous breakfast this morning.

• Home-made Instant Pancake Mix
• Blueberry Syrup for Pancakes

I should probably start by admitting that whilst we have made these pancakes several times before (they are pretty standard issue large thick pancakes) we haven’t ever gone down the suggested route of making up a jar of the dry mix to keep in the cupboard like Betty Crocker mix to be flung together when we occasionally fancy a party at 7am.  I  don’t think this matters but perhaps you will write a letter to the Man in Charge and he will say I have to take this recipe off the list because I haven’t done it properly.

But really. It’s not that hard to fling into the food processor flour, bicarb, baking powder, salt and sugar at the same time as eggs and milk. Particularly not when your boyfriend does it as you are in bed with the sinus headache from hell, working your way through the second box of tissues of the week. But I digress.

Whilst this was not the first time we’d made these pancakes, it was the first time we’d gone the whole hog and made the accompanying blueberry syrup too. It’s made of blueberries and maple syrup, an inspired but not unorthodox combination. I’m not an out and out maple syrup fan- often I find it a bit cloying- so I was pleased that this turned out as quite a sharp, very fruity sauce. It almost felt healthy!

Not one to tell your cardiologist about, but we had the most fabulous rice pudding the other night. We had some full cream milk needing used up, and also a carton of cream that was over a week out of date but which had not been opened so was still in perfect nick. So this rice pudding had about 150ml of cream in it. Eek. If anything it was a little too much like cooked rice in cream but it was warm and comforting and I was knackered when we had it, so I can’t fault it for aptness at the time.

Looked great too :-)

With a whole chapter of breakfast recipes and a boyfriend who rarely eats breakfast, sometimes you have to bend the rules…

• Croque Monsieur Bake

In my defence I did make this masterly dish at breakfast time; it then sat in the fridge all day, rather than overnight, and we had it as a rather fine Wednesday supper. Apparently, according to the book, if you eat it for supper you are supposed to do so in your dressing gown. Whoops!

I was initially worried that it called for rather a lot of mustard but once spread across six slices of bread it seemed about the right amount. Eating it you did occasionally get the odd Dijon-y mouthful, but certainly wasn’t overwhelming.

This was pretty filling, probably because of the six eggs! Other wise it was just a ham and cheese piece, right? Per person it worked out at two slices of bread, two slices of cheese, a slice of ham, two eggs and a mouthful of milk. Having it sitting in the eggy milky mixture all day made for a lovely squidgy consistency with the ham a nice firm contrast. It made a fantastic noise when I took it out of the oven, spitting and crackling away. I tried to film it but as it was an impromptu decision the lighting was all wrong and the focus out, so I shan’t share it with you!

Probably a bit of a hefty dish for brunch, I’d have said. Maybe if you’d been out living the high life the night before.

Guest post written by Dougal Stanton.

Sometimes I think Nigella Lawson has such a reputation for the kooky kitchen stuff that she gets given daft things just because she’s actually likely to use them. There was honestly no way we were buying a burger press just for the sake of two beef patties. That just wasn’t happening.

• High-Speed Hamburger with Fast Fries

For some reason it’s a lot easier to make good burger photographs than it is to make good burgers. Think of how disappointing a McDonald’s meal is compared to the photograph. Finding good burger buns is particularly hard; most of those in our nearest supermarket were very sad. Even Nigella’s baps looked a bit disappointing (rimshot).

And then, for such a simple meal, making burger meat is so very messy. The burger technique outlined here was simple and clean by comparison. I’m sure if there had been a burger press handy I would not have needed to dirty my hands at all. A few minutes each side on the griddle and you’re well on the journey to meaty heaven.

If you’ve seen 2001: A Space Odyssey, now it’s time to re-enact it in your own kitchen. The chip-making process is hilarious and gives you good excuse to wield a rolling pin like you’ve just discovered the wonder of tool-making. You literally bash the potatoes into little broken bits. Monolith and triumphant soundtrack not included.

This is the kind of meal you could look forward to making after a hard day.